Testimonial
Testimonial
My life began in a chaotic way. While pregnant with me, a domestic violence incident to my birth mother had her flee to a home for unwed mothers and orphanage, where I was adopted at 2 months of age.
Since early childhood I had this longing to know who I was, and why wasn’t I good enough. The more I tried, the further it seemed I was away from acceptance from those I strove to achieve acceptance from. Always another rung added to the proverbial ladder. My core issues have been I was never good enough no matter what I did, abandonment and rejection. Rejection runs deep, as I was rejected by the birth mother and disowned by the family that adopted me.
These issues in addition to others left me with an emptiness that I filled initially with fantasy and reading. As a means of punishment, I would frequently be sent to bed with bread (no butter) and water. Corporeal punishment was metered out regularity. In teenage years I filled that heart hole with piano, track and field, band and stealing.
As a young adult, I began filling that void with pills, food, alcohol, and running for student body positions in college to change how I felt, attempting to gain what I thought was acceptance.
Life and career advanced, I had a family, yet the unquenchable hole in my soul demanded to be filled. I was far away from God, unable to feel His presence in my life or to see He had me in the palm of His hand all along.
As career and family life spiraled out of control, I sought help at ‘The Bridge.’ I learned a set of tools, The 12-Steps, that would enable me to learn what was my responsibility and what was someone else’s. I learned to view God as a loving, compassionate Father and that I was His precious daughter. Life changing! I continue to work the 12-Steps in my life on an going basis.
Today, I know I am enough! The 12-Steps and a personal relationship with Jesus, help me to get and keep right with myself, God and others. I give back to others through grateful service. Is 43:1 “Don’t be afraid, I’ve redeemed you. I’ve called your name. You’re mine…Because I am God, your personal God.
Betty