12 STEPS to Recovery — STEP #5
Focus on the Recovery Process
Some might look at Step Five and wonder if it is necessary. Couldn’t we just take what we learned about ourselves through Step Four’s moral inventory, and then jump right to Step Six or Seven where we’re willing to then ask God to remove our shortcomings? For me, Step Five has a special healing: an honesty-building role in maintaining sobriety. It is a freeing foundation of the proven 12-step methodology.
Perhaps some of you can relate to one of my quick childhood prayers: “Jesus please forgive me for all my sins … Amen.” That quip of a prayer shows no reflection of my day’s behavior, those who may have been impacted, let alone what was at the core of my “sin” – was it selfishness, pride, jealousy, etc.? In contrast, the prayers said from a Step Five perspective are richer, deeply healing, and relationship-building with our Heavenly Father.
So why tell such personal secrets and character flaws we discovered in Step Four to another human being? There is power in sharing aloud our shortcomings and their origins with the right confidential true listener. Our shame begins to dissipate and we begin to find relief from our inner loneliness and isolation. James 5:16 describes the importance of preparing for and then having rich, relationship-deepening prayers – “Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of the righteous avails much.”
It is worth noting that in Step Five we are not yet asking either for forgiveness or solace…that will come. We are simply exorcising long-held secrets and ugliness. Of course God is fully aware of our every flaw right down to our “hidden” thoughts, yet Step Five affords us the opportunity to share with Him and another human being what we are now willing to admit and learn about our addiction and the suffocating, painful hold it has had on our life’s journey.
“He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13). It is God’s love and mercy we want to claim and experience – one day at a time.
Angela K